Introducing The Greatest Charming Pitch Pack.

I haven't written a pack of varied templates like this since The Cold Open Template Pack in 2019. 

It's going to be the most creative, the most unorthodox, the most effective pack I've ever written. 

If you want to impress prospects with creative cold pitches that cut-through the noise, and get ecstatic, excited responses, this pack is for you.

You can get it for the special early bird pre-sale price if you order before the deadline expires on 1159pm on Thursday, Central Time.

This pack will never be available for the pre-sale price ever again, so I advise you to click any one of the bright magenta BUY NOW buttons forthwith.

What's in this pack?

  • A hilarious cold email template that uses a “Spin The Wheel To Win” image, informing the prospect that it is to blame for them receiving a cold pitch from you.

  • An amusing voicenote script for sending prospects on LinkedIn. The use of a voicenote is a pattern interrupt in itself. Combined with self-deprecating humour, it can be a potent weapon.
  • A cold pitch template that includes a link to a slide deck of ideas for the prospect. Disarm with charm, demonstrate your priceless expertise, and give 'em something of value for free. This is a potent persuasive combination.
  • The “Two-Punch Combo” email that promises specific valuable information if the prospect responds. Spoiler: It’ll use curiosity bullets like this sales page does. Ooo!
  • A comically honest cold email to send when you’re down on your luck and are willing to throw a daring hail Mary.
  • A succinct smile-inducing template to get the attention of even the most hectic, time-poor prospects. This includes a follow-up sequence to send if to prospects who have the unmitigated gall to not reply immediately to your unsolicited sales message.
  • A candid, witty, and distinguished handwritten letter template with an equally delectable follow up email.

  • A smirk-worthy LinkedIn DM to use after commenting on a prospect’s LinkedIn post.

  • A less pitchy relationship building email for getting a conversation started with someone you wish to be in correspondence with.

  • A template for replying to job posts on Facebook Groups like The Cult Of Copy Job Board or the Nothing Held Back Job Board.

  • An intriguing video script to send prospects through email or DM offering free advice / an audit / some kind of value.

  • A “Punch Above My Weight” template that acknowledges that you're pitching to a big brand but makes the case that your prospects should listen to what you’ve got to say, while making an absurd offer for if they feel you’ve wasted their time.

  • An amusing cold email that uses RE: in the subject line, then immediately makes a joke out of people that use such a terrible tactic.

  • A template that uses Midjourney (or some other AI graphics platform) to allow you to incorporate a completely insane image within your cold email to great effect.
  • A heartwarming but self-effacing email that states the prospect is the first person you’ve ever cold pitched and that you’re nervous about if you’re going to get a reply or not.

  • A succinct and direct “You get X. I get Y” cold pitch with just enough self-deprecation to be effective.

Want to get this pack for the early bird pre-sale  price?

Grab it now if you want to get my greatest ever template pack for the lowest price it'll ever be available for.

£999 £119

Pre-Sale Offer Expires 1159pm Thursday 17th August, Central Time

And that's not all... 
I'm throwing in some amazing bonuses.

2 "Intoxicant Fuelled" Cold Pitch Templates:

  • The sequel to the Drunk Cold Email. That’s right. I’m going to get drunk again and write a brand new absurd cold pitch. (I don’t usually do this when writing template packs, if you’re wondering :D)

  • The Stoned Cold Email: It seems only fair that I write a cold email I will write under the influence of the devil’s lettuce. Which psychoactive substance will prove to be the better performance enhancing drug when it comes to writing effective cold pitches? We shall find out!

5 LinkedIn Connection Request Templates

Stand out when trying to connect with prospect with these unorthodox and entertaining connection requests. Sometimes prospects will not only accept your connection request, but send you a message first!

Want to get this pack for the early bird pre-sale  price?

Grab it now if you want to get my greatest ever template pack for the lowest price it'll ever be available for.

£999 £119

Pre-Sale Offer Expires 1159pm Thursday 17th August, Central Time

Do my methods work?

Of course they do! 

Just got off the phone with my new client

Charm success!

Just got off the phone with my new client who I "won" by answering a FB post looking for a copywriter.

I used one of Jon's templates to email her and send her to my portfolio.

She told me that she got so many replies to her post that she basically started by scanning the email itself.

Mine, of course, stood out because I used Jon's template.

So gang, it's more than just a great portfolio. You need to stand out even in the email copy to get them to read your portfolio.

Without using Jon's template, who knows if she would have even seen the awesomeness in my portfolio.

Thanks Jon!

Heather christian

I've Landed my first job

Yo, just to let anyone who's bought Charm Offensive Professional (or is thinking of buying), it works.

I'm only 20 years old with 2 months copywriting training.

I've been taking pointers from the beautiful, charisma-man Jon Buchan himself, and not only am I creating leads, I've also landed my first job.

2 months, little training, no experience, and barely able to use a washing machine - sounds like a hopeless case right?

Jon says: "Nah, it'll be fine"

And it was - got a job and feeling good. Much praise 😌👌

Ryan Bolson

It’s scary what you could accomplish

Jon, you’ve stumbled upon something special.

Your approach works. I don’t understand why more people don’t think of being irreverent. It’s honestly like a secret power... and it’s scary what you could accomplish with a handful of letters with bear pictures and some silly emails.

You could use this to meet famous people, get dream jobs, big paying clients, a girlfriend (why not?)...

It’s so simple yet so effective.

I sincerely hope you don’t become wildly successful or famous because then you’d popularize this method 😂

Be very encouraged!

James Thompson

Want to get this pack for the early bird pre-sale  price?

Grab it now if you want to get my greatest ever template pack for the lowest price it'll ever be available for.

£999 £119

Pre-Sale Offer Expires 1159pm Thursday 17th August, Central Time


I am just starting out. Will this work for me?

Yes. This will work for all levels of experience.

Who will this work for?

Anyone who wants to get new clients. You could be a freelancer, agency, or other b2b supplier. 

When will the pack become available to download?
This pack will be ready on September 7th. You'll get an email when it's been uploaded. 

JON BUCHAN  //  Founder, Charm Offensive

A good few years ago, I was desperate for sales after my word of mouth work dried up.

I got hellishly drunk one night and wrote a completely absurd cold email. I was still tipsy the next morning and decided it was still a good idea to send it to pretty senior Marketing Directors at big brands.

To my astonishment, it worked. I got the most amazing complimentary responses and requests for calls/meetings, from senior decision makers at RedBull, Pepsi, Symantec, Hewlett-Packard, HSBC, Barclays and countless other global brands. Symantec and Hewlett Packard became clients.

All because of a crazy cold pitch.

I decided to start teaching others my unorthodox approach to cold pitching. People listened to my weird advice and found that it worked for them, too.

That's what Charm Offensive is all about: getting the attention of busy people.

Jon Buchan

Copyright 2020 Logical Absurdity Ltd T/A Charm Offensive.